A New Anxiety


I've never been as anxious person ever in my life, emotional yeah for sure I could definitely have been considered the "cry baby" in my younger years but never an anxious person until Kayden was born.

Not until I became a mama did I feel like this a crazy need to protect my baby. Kayden & I have a very routined day to day until the weekend which is still also in a routine cause we are always going places with Greg. I didn't noticed I had this anxiety until we were invited to go to the lake with my best friend who is way more like a sister. I had told her we would definitely go with the family to the lake but the day before I got this strange anxiety because it wasn't in our routine. I got scared something would happen just because it wasn't in our day to day lives. I told Greg how I was feeling & he told me that it was exactly why we needed to go & do it.



He was right, we had to go {I wouldn't cancel anyway} but I had to put my anxiety  aside & just go & get out of the house & make a new memory with my baby. And the day was perfect, nothing went wrong & we had an amazing time with our family. The moment I got in the car the anxiousness went away who knows maybe it was a really bad case of butterflies. 



I need to remember this day, I need to not feel anxious, because we ended up having such a good time but for some reason this anxiousness is coming back again. I hate it if I keep feeling like this I'll never do anything in my life. Greg & I recently booked a trip to Vegas & I'm excited but I'm getting that feeling again, it will be the first time that we have left Kayden for longer than a couple hours he will be spending 3 nights with my parents & I'm feeling anxious being so far away from him. This will be my third time ever being on a plane & my first ever being away from my baby boy. I know I'm going to cry while we are away but I hope I can just put my worries aside & enjoy our getaway everyone needs one once in awhile, I need to remind myself it's only two days away from him & he'll be back in my arms once we touch back down in California. I'm letting a peace of my heart go out there in the world hoping he will be fine & make it back to me ok.  I know he is with two of the safest people he could be with while we take our trip & I know god will keep us all safe. 



As a mom do you ever feel like this? The anxious need to protect your baby from it all? 



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4 comments:

  1. Such a relatable post! I think, as moms, we all have moments like this. The first summer we took Autumn to the beach with my family (at 6 months) I was an anxious/nervous wreck! I don't think I even enjoyed the first few days!

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  2. Yes! I think every mother can relate to this post. Totally normal! I think it was a very good thing to go! and im glad you had a great time! New follower of your lovely blog!
    My 2 owls

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    1. So happy I'm not alone & that you joined my blog!

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  3. Hi! Just found you through the Wifessionals link up! I love your blog. This post is SO relatable to me. I'm a huge advocate for a healthy routine and good sleep, and sometimes I can get really stressed and obsessive about breaking out of our habits. When my son turned 8 months I finally chilled out a bit and we all felt so much more relaxed. I think it's also a first-time mom thing. Lately my husband and I have been going hiking every weekend with the baby and I just accept the fact that he is going to take short naps in the car but every once in a while it's worth it for the memories, and he will be just fine. :) Phew, long comment. Sorry! I am happy to be following along! Going to check you out on instagram and bloglovin. :) -Andrea www.handandtheheart.com

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