It always seems to rain...

It's finally the first rain of the season over where we live, even though I'm not big on going out in the rain it's days like this I really love being at home playing with my little boy & watching him grow & learn everyday. I'm lucky to be able to have this life & to be a stay at home mom. 

I remember the first rain last year we've come so far since then, Kayden was only 5 months old & still so tiny! I remember looking out at the rain with him, he looked so confused as to what it was on the ground so I took him outside to stand in the rain for a little bit he kind loved feeling the drops fall on his head, he kept looking up to see where it was coming from. I can't wait for more rainy days & for him to play in the puddles & make leaf boats with his mama. 

It always seems to rain on this day though it did 4 years ago today & I think always will. I can't believe it's been 4 years since you passed away grandpa but it has I miss you every day of every year. Every time Kayden does something amazing or funny I think of you & how you would have gotten such a kick out of him. 

Mom wrote me earlier this week about how she had to go show dad something in the backyard last weekend & so my dad followed after her. After they were done they tried to get back in the house but somehow the sliding glass door locked behind them, mom climbed over the fence to get to the other door, once they got inside they tried over & over again to recreate the door locking but they couldn't do it no matter how hard they slammed it shut dad said "it must be dad playing tricks on us." I believe it I know that lock to the sliding door & there is no way to lock it behind yourself, & that was so you always playing tricks on us & I know you still do. 
I think Kayden sees you, there are moments he laughs so randomly & I know it is probably you he is laughing & its a laugh he only does when he thinks someone is really acting funny. 

We miss you everyday grandpa & as selfish as it sounds I wish you were still here. I hope you & grandma are watching us & smiling. 

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